The Elf Lord and the Sorcerer
by ReluctantSlashFan
Summary: The epic battle for ones dignity leaves McGee and Palmer the butt of Tony's jokes.


Elf Lord Anwamane was in an intense sword fight with a Barbaric Orc from The Kingdom of Kzyruv. It was a fierce battle, blades clashing back and forth. Around him, he heard cries and yells of other ongoing battles. He was trying to defend his kingdom and the throne of Sardoma. His battling partner, a sorcerer by the name of Javen Silverkin, was nearby, brandishing his staff, casting spell after spell to ward off the oncoming horde.

The Orc's axe nicked his arm, sending his sword spinning out of his hand. He knew he was a goner, Javen too focused on his own opponents to come to his rescue, when a chirping came from his pocket.

"Ah crap," he said suddenly.

"Oh, how the mighty Elf Lord hath fallen," the Orc commented, raising his axe above his head. "Any last words, cretin."

"Uh, yeah, I've gotta take this," McGee said placing his right palm on the top of his head, digging his cell phone out with his left hand. The Orc glared at McGee before turning and engaging a druid in a new battle.

"Hello," Tim said putting his phone to his ear.

"_Hey, McGee..."_ Tony trailed off, and McGee could practically see his eyebrows furrowing. "_Who's yelling?"_

"Uh, the TV," Tim replied quickly, walking towards his sword.

_"You don't watch TV. It sounds more like a video game_," DiNozzo responded slowly.

"I can assure you, Tony, I am not playing a video game," McGee said balancing his phone between his shoulder and ear as he snatched his foam sword off the ground and placed it in the scabbard at his hip.

"_If you say so,"_ Tony responded, a hint of skepticism creeping into his voice. "_We need you to get back here as soon as possible. A body was found."_

"Alright, just let me head home and get changed…"

"_No, no, no, you need to get here now."_

_ "_But," Tim started knowing he could not show up to NCIS dressed like this. "Tony…"

"_We need you here now. And have you seen Palmer? I can't get a hold of him."_

"Uh…" McGee started turning to see Javen Silverkin 'kill' three dwarves. "I have an idea where he is."

"_Fine, just get here. Now."_ And DiNozzo hung up, leaving behind the dial tone.

Tim gave his phone a miserable look before ending the connection and pocketing it. He then crossed the field, now with both hands on top of his head, and elbowed Javen in the back.

"Who dares interrupt the mighty sorcerer Javen during a mighty spell casting?" Javen trailed off when he realized who was standing behind him. "Orophin, why art thee…?" He finally noticed that Tim had his hands on his head. "Oh."

Slowly, Javen sheathed his staff in the scabbard on his back then placed his own hands on his head. "What's up?" Palmer asked curiously.

"DiNozzo called, we've got a body."

"Oh, well, then let's get out of here and go change…"

"Nope," McGee replied shaking his head.

"What?"

"They need us now."

"But…" Jimmy gestured to himself and McGee. "We can't… DiNozzo would… Are you kidding me?"

"Sorry, Palmer."

Jimmy was quiet for a moment, gnawing on his bottom lip, but finally he nodded and said, "Well, at least, tell me you know where…"

"I'm sure if we check by the throne…"

"Well, yeah, but you know…"

"Yes, but it doesn't hurt to look."

"Fine, lead the way."

The two started across the field, both being sure to keep their hands on their heads, moving towards the throne to their 'kingdom.' They saw their ruler engaged in their own battle, taking on four Orcs alone.

"How do we…?" McGee turned to Palmer gesturing towards their ruler.

"Uh…" Palmer began waving his hands above his head, immediately getting hit in the shoulder by an arrow. "Really!" he called to the elf that had just attacked him.

"Palmer, your hands," Tim reminded the other man.

"Oh, crap," Jimmy whispered replacing his hands. "Well, then, how do we get…?" Palmer's question was interrupted by their ruler's cell phone ringing.

"Like that," McGee responded and Palmer nodded just as their ruler approached them, hands on their head.

"Are we ready?"

"Yeah," both guys said simultaneously.

"Good, then let's go."

**NCIS**

Jimmy looked up at the building, for the first time not really wanting to go inside. He glanced at McGee, giving him a helpless look.

"I can't go in there," he whispered looking up at the building again.

"But we have to Jimmy," Tim responded softly. "It's our job. Now man up, and get out of the car."

"McGee, out on the battle field this is a regal sorcerer's robe. In there," he pointed at the building, "I am wearing a freaking dress."

"Look, all we really have to worry about is DiNozzo. Once he gets it out of his system… Well, he'll still rag on us, but it won't be as bad." Jimmy made a whining sound in his throat. "Besides, we don't want Gibbs coming out here looking for us."

Palmer sighed heavily, but nodded and said, "You're right."

"Of course I'm right. So, are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be," Jimmy mumbled looking at the building a third time.

"Don't worry Palmer; we'll be going through this together."

**NCIS**

Tony DiNozzo was playing a game of solitaire when he heard the elevator doors ding. He looked up, expecting to see Ziva, but was surprised when he spotted McGee and Palmer. Well, surprised was kind of cutting it. More like shocked, flabbergasted, and bewildered; any of the three would suffice. But the one emotion above all others was excited. It felt as if Christmas had come early.

The only way he could describe his two co-workers were a rejected Legolas and The Grim Reaper on his day off. McGee was wearing a leather cape and knee-high leather boots over top a dark green vest and dark pants. While Palmer had on a floor length black robe tied at the waist by a silver rope belt.

A huge grin spread across Tony's face. For a second he really tried to hold in the laughter, but this was just too good to be true, and soon he was doubling over, laughing to the point where he couldn't breathe.

"Yeah, laugh it up, DiNozzo," McGee grumbled moving his hand in a circle.

"It's just…" Tony shook his head, putting one finger up.

"Fine DiNozzo, we're going to change," Tim snapped as he and Jimmy started towards the locker room.

"No, no, no," DiNozzo exclaimed jumping up from his desk and blocking their route. "I…" he snorted, waving his hands. "I mean…" he gestured to the two younger guys. "H-how…" he sucked in a deep breath. "How did you two get girlfriends?" he managed to wheeze out.

Both guys glared at him and then continued to the locker rooms. "I sure hope Frodo doesn't mind you being missing. I mean, it's not exactly the 'Fellowship' if Legolas and Gandolf are gone."

Tim flipped him off while Jimmy hunched his shoulders and put his hood up. Tony was still laughing feebly when the elevators dinged again. For the second time, he was expecting Ziva, and was really excited to tell her what he had just seen, berating himself for not taking a picture, only to turn and freeze at the sight.

He was wearing a golden crown atop his head. His maroon cape fell to just below his knees, tied around his neck by a golden rope. His felt boots came to just below his knee, and his dark pants were tucked inside. And his tunic was royal blue, decorated with a coat of arms that Tony did not recognize.

"What?" Ducky asked curiously looking down at his wardrobe. "I think I look rather dashing."

"I-I…" Tony was at a loss for words, a rarity for him, and watched in complete awe as Ducky walked past him towards the locker rooms.

"You should try larping, lad. It's quite a rush," the older man commented in passing before leaving Tony side.

"Well, that was just weird," Ziva commented approaching him. Tony nodded, still unable to speak. "I mean, I expected that from McGee and Palmer, but to see Ducky…"

"Uh-huh," Tony responded nodding again.

"Though, I must admit, he does make good royalty."

**NCIS**

**Yes, another collab between Benny and I. We will neither confirm nor deny that we have intimate knowledge of larping.**

**So, thanks for reading, drop us a comment if you can, and we own nothing.**

**PEACE OFF...**


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